Hmm.

Okay, I have been slacking big-time.  At some point about a month ago I just started getting away from the P90X workouts. I can't say what brought it about or what the problem is - a combination of events getting in the way of working out and then I didn't get myself back on track. It's not that I don't want to do it anymore, I just kinda hit a wall I guess.  Not sure why. Not sure when I'll get that inspiration back. . .. .

I'm the first to admit that I had a tough go of it, and big challenges (emotionally) when my body refused to respond to all the hard work and effort.  It was harder than I can articulate, and more frustrating also, to keep up the 'good work'  when nothing much was happening. I would see these great transformation stories .. . .but it seemed I was doomed to toil away the same as everyone else without any transformation!  I expected results!  And my stubborn body wasn't having it.

In the time since wrapping my first round of P90X I also learned something new in regard to my hypothyroid condition & my metabolism... . after a blood draw and analysis, it turned out that I was deficient in a certain area that can affect how the body utilizes protein to build muscle, among other things weight and metabolism related .... . . and I've been on an additional medication to correct this.  Coincidentally to this (at about the same time, that is) I also cut out refined sugars. Both of these have been going on for a month now.. ... but while I got these two things under control, the will to work out has been flagging. Greatly.

Who knows what my problem is. Maybe I'm not good at doing more than one thing at a time? Doing no refined sugars produced a loss of weight (all that bloat, I'm sure) at first, but now I'm plateau'd on that even. Not only b/c I'm not paying as careful attention (other than eschewing refined sugar) but also because I'm not working out so much.  So maybe now that I'm used to the no sugar changes it's time to hit the 'gym' again (by gym I mean the P90X gym).

I really have a hard time finding my motivation lately. But I am loathe to get back into 'old' habits. ... aka: eating while watching tv in the evenings ( which =overeating without thinking about it) and snacking too much at night. It's sooo much easier to just. ... well, do nothing versus do something (exercise). ... but the catch to that is that then I feel bad about it (doing nothing). So there's nothing to gain there (except weight, and that's obviously the last thing I want). What's holding me back?!?!

I'm hoping that blogging about it will help me discover my motivation again.  Ugh.. .

Motivation?!?! Motivaaaaaaaaaaation.. .. . .. where ARE you?!?! Please come back. Soon!!